04: Blandishments of Love
(A sentimental nostalgic rant at https://www.instagram.com/p/Bh58qe9hTxg/)
To my dearest Kimberly,
Perhaps this notion has crossed your mind. Consider this: you are in a relationship, and both of you are deeply in love of each other (all of us have been told of a cliché of ‘to love is to love a person’s whole, of both their adorableness and shortcomings’); yet when you yourself have had a bad day, you would want to lay down, resting yourself next to your partner, not having a care in the world.
Life is full of sweet mistakes, and love is an honest one to make. We love a lot of things: meat, vegetables, vegan stuff, drinks (alcohol, and other beverages which are inherently better, such as coffee and an occasional can of soft drink), desserts of all cultures, and books that are of ‘high’ and ‘low’ literary values. Yet what we love the most is to love and to be loved. The kind of joy and happiness we feel, to a maximum level of ecstasy and euphoria, perhaps cannot be rivalled — with the exception of, some might say, when one is going through a breakup, the kind of desolation and despair that permeates, to a maximum level of dolefulness and depression.
He understood her, or at least he tried to understand her. Because he had always thought they understood the world and through the right lenses, comprehended the places and points which mattered in the same way. But this was only his imagination unfortunately; such an imagination where in reality she had never fallen for him. She had even already bought an apartment with her fiancé up in the Eastern District. Her fiancé knew about the admirer — although not about his pestering (undivided love); but was her fiancé worried? Had her fiancé ever worried on such matters? Either way, at the end, after reaching a consensus with herself and her fiancé, they (she) agreed on granting him one last wish, to the lover who persisted (persevered) for seven years for a platonic relationship: just herself and the lover, a trip to Malaysia or Thailand. You might think this as a series of unfortunate events — the fiancé somehow agreeing on this and even he wanted to tag along, he could not. He did not have the sufficient funds for the journey. And what he could do was to place all of his trust on his fiancée and hope for the best.
Along the journey the lover had had several advances, but they were all shut down by her. It would be a lie that she had no feelings towards his actions and romantic gestures of yesteryear, something that we would never understand now as they were lost forever in the past and reciprocated in mass production as a simulacrum. And yet she stayed firm, as she and her fiancé were deeply in love as I have said not long ago. A week had passed, and she turned her eternal lover down one last time; his love would be brandished at her in words until hell breaks loose once again.
I would end on this note as my coffee is arriving; I do not want to have anything spoilt the paper. It is rather parlous to write on the dining table when there are food and drinks nearby.
Always and forever,
Trevor (your lover)
